How to Talk to a Cancer Patient Without Being a Complete Twit

I enjoyed reading “8 rules on how to talk to a cancer patient” because I think much of it is written with ‘tongue in cheek’.  Great title!

In UK we might even spell the word ‘twit’ slightly differently (UK people will get it!). Some of the rules are directed at doctors and I’m sure some doctors will laugh (if you’re a doctor and you didn’t laugh, sorry). I think one or two are a bit harsh and could potentially backfire and at least one I partly disagree with.  Personally I try to balance my reactions to not come over as a ‘pity party’ and something which is genuinely offensive or upsetting to me as a cancer patient.  I appreciate understanding and empathy, perhaps sympathy, but I certainly don’t want pity.

I’ve added rule number 9 which is a true story I picked up in my own community which I found absolutely unacceptable and I certainly did not laugh.  Thanks to ‘Patient A’ for the quote.

Read the 8 rules here:

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/how-to-talk-to-a-cancer-patient-without-being-a-complete-twit

You may also enjoy this article which contains 16 ‘red flags’ that might mean it’s time to find a new doctor.  Easier in some countries than others and I suspect we have all encountered at least one of them.  I don’t think we should be changing doctors too often and we shouldn’t be changing just because of one of these ‘red flags’ (although the example above is pretty offensive).

https://themighty.com/2018/10/bad-doctor-red-flag-comments/?utm_source=engagement_bar&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=facebook_share

Another good one is an actor based video which discusses about the things people sometimes say (often clumsily) to patients that often don’t hit the right chord – check out my article “Things not to say to a someone with cancer“.

And of course we all look so well as Neuroendocrine Cancer patients – but you should see our insides.
Thanks for reading

Ronny

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One thought on “How to Talk to a Cancer Patient Without Being a Complete Twit

  • Christina Smallbridge

    I understand both sides of this dilemma – as a caregiver to my mom’s cancer diagnosis and as a cancer patient myself. Sometimes it is listening and saying nothing that sends the loudest message…

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